Hey guys and gals! If you’re one of the lucky few that can read, it’s week 2 of Sausage Swipes. This week, I’ve swiped on some very questionable and very impressionable profiles. Let me know what you think…
Up first we have Hannah. She’s into butt-stuff, and she likes stuff up her butt. Not sure if everything she’s saying is to be hilarious or honest, but I’ll hope she follows her good conscience and chooses honesty. Because of the bio and sex-appeal combination, I give this profile a 9.0. Who has the point she needs for a perfect 10?
Up next is Joanne. With the combination of her occupation, broken umbrella, and forward bio, I give her bio a 7.2. Not bad, but definitely doesn’t make me wanna get caught in some rain with her. Plus, I’m not trying to get my umbrella broken either.
Up next is Chyna. Not sure if that’s her real name and honestly don’t remember which girl she is in the picture. What I do know is that both of those bodies look fairly capable of recruiting some fine-looking humans. Also curious is Chyna knows our friends Joanne or Hannah, because Chyna’s profile seems to combine the other two bios. Between the bio and the bod, I’m gonna give this one a 8.7. Wish I could remember the face.
Last but not least is Colleen. If you didn’t think the previous three ladies were direct enough, Colleen will give you some hope. I for one am concerned for Colleen, and as a potential partner (please don’t, you’ll probably catch some crazy STD no one’s heard of before) I hope you would be too. No need for words, I’m giving this bio a fat 0.0, don’t @ me on that.
Consider all that info on my tab.
Podcast personality, sports fanatic, sausage enthusiast